This week is dedicated to I MATTER. I began the I MATTER posts as a way to remind us that we need to be at the top of our own priority list. We need to make sure we care for ourselves emotionally and physically. However, being mothers, grandmothers, wives, friends, professionals, and volunteers, we tend to take better care of others than we do of ourselves. So, sometimes it is good to stop and re-focus…literally, smell the roses.
Though I am the one who has preached this message for the last eight years, I occasionally have to remind myself of this. For the past year, I have not been on the priority list and it has been wearing at me physically and emotionally. I have allowed a situation to rob my joy and my health. I allowed stress eating to take over…poor sleeping patterns to develop…occasional despondency to set in. I did not have the courage to make necessary changes at the time. Fortunately, I began working to turn things around in the last month and now am going full throttle to make big changes. Why? Because I MATTER. Here is what I have started and will ramp up this week…my I MATTER cleanse, if you will:
- This week I will stay 15 minutes longer in the gym every day for the next two weeks, and get up and move more during the day for always. (my workouts have been going well and I am seeing it show in inches lost and strength gained)
- I will eat less sugar and smaller, healthier servings.
- I will return to healthy, productive, joyful thinking and not allow others to affect it. Just in the last two days I have felt more joyful and relief just considering a return to I MATTER. Let me just say to you, ladies…do not allow anyone to disrepect or dishonor you. Do not give them that power. Honor and respect yourself by not allowing someone to put you down or it wears at your inner being. Life is too short to stay in toxic situations.
- I will not fear change, and be open to new beginnings…no matter what that means or where it takes me.
- I will return to loving to interact with people again. I have become a little bit of a recluse in the last few months and I miss going out and enjoying people and the world around me.
- I will clean out some clutter at home and get organized. I will also finish setting up my new office at home.
I believe we all know that we can do even more for those we love, if we will just take proper care of #1. It’s a choice we make daily. What areas have you allowed to slip? What do you need to do to take better care of yourself?
Let us know, and of course………………………………………………………..
KEEP SMILING!
Now a little I MATTER SELF CARE…CHECK OUT THESE PRODUCTS FOR PAMPERING:
Glad you’re back to taking good care of yourself Pam. Love this feature 🙂
Thanks for the encouragment, Lisa!
This article is a timely reminder. When I was working and raising my family, I saw this period of my life (58) as a time when I was a priority. But gradually I dropped down on the priority scale with no real reason. My son is all grown up, I am in a better place financially and have more free time. Thank you for a great article, think I am going to print and keep it as a reminder.
You are so welcome, Teresa. I hope it helps! Thanks for letting me know…
I’ll be printing it and reading it daily…excellent reminder to those of us who have lapsed…many thanks…
You are so welcome Judy!
This post prompted me to google “how to say no.” I found a list of 48 ways to say no and some of the ways really resonate with me. And why do I need to say no more? When I retired I was excited about the extra time and flexibility I would have. Some friends, family, organizations and businesses also were excited about my new free time. I started to fall on my priority list and it has sucked some of the joy from my retirement. From today on, Pam, I’m remembering that I do, indeed, matter. “I think I’ll pass” seems to be a kind but definitive way to say no.
Please report back to us, Linlee, and let us know how it is going. We have to make sure as we decide where to place our time, that we do not let go of us. If they don’t understand (the ones you tell you will pass to), that is their issue. It is your life and it is a short one…let’s enjoy the moments! Thanks for sharing….
Thanks for the reminder to spend a little more time in the gym. Also, we’ll be selling our house soon, so the comments about organization at home are very timely
You are welcome, Gail. Right after I go to the gym tomorrow morning I will begin tackling some target areas in my house!
Such a thoughtful, candid post, Pam. It can be so difficult to take care of ourselves first, and your words are a strong reminder that it’s ok…even essential….to do just that. Be well, and thank you for shining a caring light on such an important subject!
Thank you so much, Mary. I am glad readers feel like this is helpful and I hope to always be candid with you in order to bring joy and hope to your computer screen.
I needed this. I am also printing it out. I have let a bad situation at work rob me of joy. I have no control over what is going of there, but I can control my response and what I allow. This message is timely in so many areas of life. Thank you your transparency and talking about it when things don’t go well. Speaking for myself, it’s really helpful to have some insight into how you are dealing with some negatives. It happens to all of us at times. Your advice is much appreciated!
I am so sorry, Karen, as I know how tough this can be. While I am being a little transparent, I will be more transparent at a later date. I have my reasons for withholding all that I am walking through at this time. I will say that friends and family support meant everything to me in the last few months. Some just called on a regular basis to ask how I was and it was so important because there were times those calls pulled me out of a mire. Also, many of you know I have a deep faith and prayer was and is so important to me. I also focused on the positives and made myself start each day with thankfulness and specificly finding things to be thankful for. I never gave up hope that things could change. Each time I thought I was at the bottom of pit, I would take a small step to do something positive to make changes…even if it was new exercise goals, or taking lunch instead of eating out so often, or working everynight on this blog. Small steps evenutally move toward positive change. I hope this helps. There will be more because our over 50 lives are about constant change and how we navigate the changes successfully.
I make time for reading every day and that is such a blessing when it comes to staying on an even keel. Just the act of picking up a book is so reassuring. Then there is watching the birds at our feeders and reading your posts. Thank you, Pam!
How sweet, Jill. I also read alot and this morning I had coffee on my patio, with a book and the birds. I have not done that in so long…it was awesome. Great advice.
Thank you Pam. In the last year, I have really let myself get into habits that have sucked the energy and positivity out of me. I loved your inspiring list, and I am with you!
Awesome, Linda…so much more fun to have a group to go through the refreshment time with!
This is very timely for me as well. I semi retired several years ago and moved to be near my daughters and grandchildren. Since that time I have done everything to be a good and loving mother and grandparent but literally nothing for me. To the point that I would be slightly embarrassed to admit. I have the hardest time saying no because the guilt overwhelms me, even on the tiniest things. My health has suffered and I have stopped doing many of the things that I always enjoyed before moving here. I know I have to help myself and I’ve started several times And then lapsed right back into the same behavior. I’m printing this list and putting it where I will see it daily. Thank you for giving me a little push through your example Pamela. Thank you thank you!!!
You are welcome. ELaine. You might read in the comments about other women who are learning to say NO. Just try it occasionally…they will still love you!!
Very good topic and much needed!
Thank you so much! I hope it helps….
Good for you, Pam! I fully understand how easy it is to allow ourselves to give into the “dark side”, as they say in those Star Wars movies. We have had such a long winter here in the Midwest, & I have been wallowing in the winter blahs for a couple of months. I decided this afternoon that I am done with winter whether it is done or not. I am going to be putting away my snow boots, preparing my heavy sweaters for storage, & storing them & my fleece until fall. Spring cleaning is up next. It’s time for my house & me to look & feel like spring!
Good for you Becky! At least your face can wear some sunshine!
I’m so sorry that you have been going through a tough time, but so grateful you shared. I think we all sometimes believe everyone else has the “perfect life.” Just knowing others have struggles makes our own a little easier to bear. I am so inspired that you have a plan to make yourself a priority! I remember at the beginning of the New Year reading an ‘I Matter’ post and vowing then to start making more time to pamper myself. If I recall all I wanted was to start having mani/pedis…it’s April and I have had one of each. So clearly I have not followed through and this is a wake up call for me. I don’t go to the gym but need to start exercising and eating healthier. I have put on a few pounds this winter and feel so out of shape. So, thank you for giving me the push I need to make a plan and work towards a few goals that are long overdue!
We can do this!!
We can do it, Linda. And we will. I am more determined now than ever to make some changes and take back my joy! Thanks for the support and encouragment.
Way to go Pam!! I love your I Matter messages because so many ofudneed reminding.
I need reminding too, Jennifer. I do hope they help.
You sound like a resilient lady and I believe you will get through this difficult time.
I am resilient and strong, but sometimes when things are constant and wearing at me, I am not good to stop and slap myself awake. I let things wear at me too long this time. But…no more. I just returned from my extra 15 minutes at the gym! I am on my way….thanks, Julie.
I’m glad you found your way back to YOU. Thank you for this post!
You are so welcome Jane. My I Matter Cleanse, Day 1 is going great!
Love this article and I needed this article. I am learning that “no” is a complete sentence. Thank you for the encouragement and kudos to you for taking control of your life’s situation.
Thanks so much Clearissa!
Thank you. Not only for the post but for this being a mainstay in your blog and life. You’ve taught me much. You’ve lived it all. This is a timeless adage and one I need to (have a cattle prod applied?) remember and live. My marriage is fraught with danger and relapse. I matter.
You do matter, Sherry. Please don’t forget it.