How to avoid regrets after a closet purge…from personal experience

I really try to answer when a reader requests a topic.  So today, I am answering how to avoid having regrets after a closet purge.

You can search the topic and find plenty of websites with formulas, but I thought it might be best to share with you my experiences. 

I think I will do this in two posts…today, I will begin with some of the items I tossed and why…on Friday, I will share some of the items I kept and why.

REGRETS

Pamela Lutrell in polka dot coat on over 50 feeling 40

 

Let’s start with my biggest regret so far.  The coat pictured above.  I purchased It years ago at Stein Mart and I have always loved it…yes, loved it!  So why would I toss it?

I was thinking, “I have worn it to many events around town….it is memorable…events for work will now be fewer than they were.”  So I kissed it goodbye and regret that I did.

LESSON #1:  IF YOU LOVE IT, KEEP IT!  YOU NEVER KNOW WHEN YOU MIGHT NEED A BOOST OF CONFIDENCE FROM A GARMENT THAT PUTS A SMILE ON YOUR FACE!

NOT MISSING THESE

Pamela Lutrell in Boxy Jacket on Over 50 Feeling 40

This plaid jacket is a great jacket…but I decided to let it go because I had three plaid jackets…all black & white patterns.

This one had a boxy print and the design is not as stylish as the other two.  So I sent it on it’s way.

LESSON #2:  MAKE SURE WHAT YOU KEEP HAS A FLATTERING FIT, AND IS NOT DUPLICATED IN YOUR CLOSET.

Pamela Lutrell on closet purge on Over 50 Feeling 40

I did wear this jacket to work several times.  But, for some reason, I have not loved it and was fine with letting it go.  Believe it or not, it is a heavy jacket not really good for warm weather.

LESSON #3:  IF YOU DON’T LOVE IT AND KNOW YOU WON’T WEAR IT, THEN DON’T KEEP IT.

Pictured here with my daughter, I wore this entire outfit often.  I did keep the paper-mache necklace!

The pants had become a little stretched out and did not fit well, and the top really made me look larger than I am. 

Though I wore it often, I have not missed it at all. 

LESSON #4:  MAKE SURE EVERYTHING IN YOUR CLOSET FITS YOU WELL AND IS FLATTERING TO YOUR SHAPE.

You may be looking at this picture and thinking what I am thinking…Why did she wear this at all???

I actually had this tunic in three colors, and when I was larger than I am now, I wore them mostly as toppers. You can see…it was time to send them on their way!

LESSON #5:  DON’T KEEP CLOTHES THAT FIT A PAST VERSION OF YOUR BODY…KEEP WHAT FITS NOW.

When I saw these shoes at Marshalls, I thought they were so cute and comfy.

But, when I began to style them at home, I often was not happy with how the straps cut off my leg length. The proportions looked funny.

I wore them a couple of times with faux leather leggings, but decided I did not wear them enough to keep. 

LESSON #6: PAY CAREFUL ATTENTION IN FRONT OF A FULL LENGTH MIRROR TO HOW AN OUTFIT LOOKS. IF IT IS NOT YOUR BEST MOST FLATTERING STYLE, THEN SAY GOODBYE!

I hope this is helping.  Tomorrow I will share a few of the pieces I kept and explain why.  Leaving the professional office world has been such a learning experience…especially for my wardrobe!

Thoughts anyone?  Please share and always…..

KEEP SMILING!!

UPDATE:  For everyone who said that the comment section is not easy to read on different devices, I have my web designer looking into this.  Hopefully, I will have a fix soon!

If you are shopping, please consider using these links and thank you for the support!

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MY COMPLEXION LOVES CHAMONIX…KEEPING ME YOUTHFUL!  Currently, running a FALL SPECIAL, BUY TWO, GET TWO FREE!

Chamonix on Over 50 Feeling 40

All natural, plant-cell technology skincare

 

 

By Pamela Lutrell

 

28 Comments

  1. Interesting article. Yes, the polka dot coat would be great with a white tshirt and dark straight jeans…
    I totally understand why you let those cute shoes go. Super cute shoes are a bad purchase when they go with nothing you own. We have all been there.

  2. You just made me miss that coat more! Great idea to wear it that way…thanks for sharing.

  3. I love all your advice! I have donated clothes for years. I unfortunately put on weight and needed clothes that fit better. I add items to my donate bag, but before I donate, I go through every item to make sure I do want to get rid of it. I have honestly put things in the bag and taken them out maybe 2 or 3 times! I know, bad on me! but then I usually give in and donate. And your “rules” above are so helpful. I end up donating a lot of stuff that never looked good on me but bought on splurge or hoping it would look better on me if I lost 5 lbs. Cannot wait for the next installment

  4. Great topic Pam. I cannot tell you how many times I have regretted getting rid of items. I have a topper similar to that polka dot one, only in navy and slightly smaller dots. I wore it many times and then put it away for a while and pulled it out again this year. If you have room to store them, it is great to revisit old friends. So many sites tell you to get rid of things if not worn in past year, and it has taken me a few sad losses to realize this is not my style. I say as well, if you really like it find a way to store it to revisit later. Can’t wait for tomorrow to see what is in that list.

  5. You are so right, Diane…so many say to toss it if you don’t wear for a year. What if that year is 2020? Many items I haven’t worn this year but I am not ready to say goodbye just yet!

  6. If you are on the fence, turn the garment inside out, or hang it with the hanger hook facing backwards. If you haven’t worn it in a couple of months, you have your answer. My purges involve the fact that my weight fluctuates a lot. So frustrating! But the biggest problem I used to have was buying things I liked but didn’t love, just because they were on deep discount and I “needed” them for work. Some of those things I’ve already purged, and my regret came a lot sooner than yours, Pam. I’ve decided to try to stop that regret from happening by having a list of needed items, finding some specific candidates, and then buying when the price is right … whether that’s regular price, a simple sale, clearance, or secondhand. Don’t get me wrong: I have a bulging closet of beautiful clothes at quite breathtakingly low prices (ex Chicos black knit cowl neck tunic bought new at the store for $4!), but not everything in there is a love, for sure.

  7. Thanks for sharing, Linda! I do think a list helps and an understanding what we want out clothes to say about us to the rest of the world…the way we dress every day always says something about us.

  8. Wonderful points. I have regretted so many of my closet purges because I listened to someone’s “if you haven’t worn it”.🙄. My modes change often. 😉
    I would like to pose a question about experiences/insights on selling those purged closet items…
    Is it worth it? Time consuming? Best way? Etc.?
    I have always just donated but my husband suggested Ebay. Someone he talked to encouraged the thought.🤪
    Thank you and have a blessed day. 🍁

  9. Hi Robin, I am so glad to be selling on EBay! I work with a friend and we split the profits, but she does all of the heavy lifting. That money has enabled me to purchase new clothes for my new life!!

  10. Please don’t regret purging the polka dot coat! I look at garments like that and I think if I’m hanging onto it just because I love it but, really, am I going to wear it or will I replace it with another piece I love just as equally. Remind yourself that it certainly is a memorable piece. When I retired 2 years ago I had to rid my closet of most of my professional wear; beautiful wool skirts, expensive coats, lovely sweater dresses. I started by giving many things to a colleague/friend who I knew would never be able to afford a cashmere coat and I gave her 2! A young girl who just started teaching wore the same shoe size I do received a number of quality boots. I found joy in knowing others are using and maybe loving pieces of my old wardrobe & life. Your coat was lovely, you looked terrific in it, you enjoyed it numerous times! Feel good that someone else is loving it now!

  11. This is definitely a ‘first world’ problem. How fortunate are we to have such lovely things, and in such abundance, that we concern ourselves with whether or not to part with them?! I recently let go all of my fancy evening dresses AND my wedding gown. Early in our relationship, my husband and I lived where we could often attend the symphony or go out late to a bistro or jazz club. A relocation and sixteen years on, I realized I was simply hanging onto beautiful memories. Those items have been gone for several months now, and guess what?! The beautiful memories are still with me! 😊

  12. Last weekend I put on a cardigan to wear to a backyard distanced dinner with friends. I put on 3 different tees under it, changed pants, put on- took off a necklace. That cardi was never going to fit right. It’s in the Goodwill bag.
    Thanks for helping me understand why I never wear the several pairs of Mary Jane style shoes in my closet. Despite being expensive shoes, they are going out!

  13. Very good topic, thank you. My problem is “What if?” So many of the ‘what ifs’ are less likely to happen than me being hit by a meteor. I decided to make a couple of capsule outfits to cover most unexpected social events and have them just in case. They are like a security blanket and now I can get rid of lots more clothes and try to be more organized.

  14. 2020 is definitely not a benchmark for getting rid of something you haven’t worn. I am definitely hanging on to some things because they give me hope that there will come a day when we will be frequenting nice restaurants & attending parties again. After I retired, it took me a while to donate some of my corporate wear that no longer fit my lifestyle. I keep some basic pieces which I can & do incorporate into my more casual life. In fact, I wore a black blazer out for coffee with family yesterday.

  15. This is such a helpful topic! I feel like the queen of purging because I do it seasonally, and sometimes in between. Most of the things I let go are the impulse purchases, so I’m trying not to do that kind of shopping any longer. Part was trial and error when adapting to a new lifestyle, where you are now. The way I see the regrets, since we can’t get them back, is to just look for a new amazing piece that makes us feel just as confident and happy. I’m still learning along with you, so topics like this are really helpful! Sometimes things just serve their purpose and it’s time to let someone else have fun with them (speaking here of clothing!) Think how happy that jacket made another woman feel who found it! Bringing joy to others!

  16. Of course those of you who have said this are right! From now on I will think of those receiving and hope it brings them smiles!! Thanks to all who shifted the focus to a better place!

  17. Hi Robin! Tell me a little more. Have you never done a closet clean? Share a little more about how you are a beginner! Thanks for reaching out!

  18. Oh boy, your post today really has me thinking.

    I purchased a beautiful top a couple of years ago that I absolutely loved — on the hanger. I’ve worn it maybe three or four times. But for some reason I simply cannot part with it. It looks ‘okay’ on — but ‘okay’ is not the same as great.

    I have a feeling I am going to part with it this weekend!

    Thanks, Pam!

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