The benefits of confidence as we age
Happy Thursday! Let’s discuss today the benefits of confidence as we age.
The idea of discussing the benefits of confidence has been birthed out of different responses to the term….TEAM OVERDRESSED.
Some love it…some balk at it…but really it all boils down to one word…confidence.
I know I write about this often, but allow me to review why the benefits of confidence are so important as we age.
I am going to begin with a brief review of how this blog came to be….
THE BENEFITS OF CONFIDENCE AS WE AGE: HOW I LEARNED FIRST HAND
I will keep this as brief as I can…..
My time as a working mother wore down my confidence. As a busy- financially-strapped woman, I let go of me.
I stopped caring about my appearance and at age 50 experienced a wake-up call…AH-HA moment…whatever you want to call it.
When I began to care about me again…from the inside out…my confidence began to grow.
A friend noticed the difference…all that I was learning I was sharing with women around me…and she said…”YOU NEED TO START A BLOG.”
I still did not have enough confidence to picture my face on the blog and this mask was my profile picture for a couple of years….I truly was the headless blogger…behind books and newspapers…and dramatic head chops.
Seems so silly now…fourteen years later.
Fellow bloggers were the ones who said…SHOW ALL OF YOU…your audience will grow…so I did and it was true that more came to read what I had to say.
That was when my confidence began to grow again…suddenly I cared more about my health and desired to accomplish more as I aged. New opportunities appeared. A new freedom began to grow.
There was light and excitement within me as I embraced the woman God had created me to be.
I was living the benefits of confidence as we age in real time.
THE BENEFITS OF CONFIDENCE AS WE AGE: THE LIST
Basically, if you search “the benefits of confidence as we age,” you will find the importance of confidence for mental health and overall well being.
You will also discover that studies reveal “confidence” as we age is a problem…many seniors struggle with it.
There are several articles which recommend social interaction, to avoid isolation, volunteer, get involved, practice physical exercise, and go outdoors.
This blog has recommended the same things, particularly to live life one day at a time, face the day with joyful expectations, and have a purpose which can be a profession, volunteer work, or family time….or both.
However, I have learned first hand that my outward appearance does affect my confidence in big ways…and more happens for me when I take care of that before leaving the house.
I am more likely to meet new people, to talk with others, and to recognize new opportunities when I look my very best…and those are huge benefits of confidence.
Remember also that confidence and arrogance are two different things!
THE BENEFITS OF CONFIDENCE AS WE AGE: TEAM OVERDRESSED
What does “Team Overdressed” have to do with confidence and the benefits of confidence?…well, it has everything to do with it.
When we say (and I believe the creator of the term would agree with me) we are on Team Overdressed, we are saying that we want to be confident and find joy in that day…no matter what is on the calendar.
How we find that confidence in what we are wearing is a very unique, individual decision…that Is why there are many levels.
I may feel confident wearing jeans and blazers…and you may feel confident wearing athletic style…and someone else may be confident in fashion-forward distressed denim…IT IS INDIVIDUAL.
YOU are the best one to know your own unique personal best which will have you feeling confident when you go out and enjoying your time each day.
Of course, I do not dress up to stay around the house or be in the yard…but when I leave the house, I want the world to know that I am joyful, approachable, polished, creative, and current.
And I will add one…INTELLIGENT!
AND, finally, to know that I am completely confident …which is most often reflected by the smile on my face.
The greatest benefit of confidence is a JOYFUL ATTITUDE.
If we do not dress in a manner to show self respect and confidence, it is so easy to slip into depression. And I know that from experience!
I often make sure to say hello to women I see dressed poorly, because, so often their clothing is saying I need someone to care.
TEAM OVERDRESSED is just a tongue-in-cheek way to say we care…we want to enjoy each day…we are still here…and there is much yet for us to do and say.
Also, I am more comfortable when I am dressed in my confident best, than in comfy sweats at home. Because the first way is empowering.
This can be done on any income, for any size body, at any age….some of my best looks came out of Goodwill and I definitely looked like a member of Team Overdressed.
Those who love Team Overdressed have said they do not mind at all being the best dressed woman at lunch, at the wedding, at church, wherever.
Team Overdressed is a flag we wave to say…we care about ourselves …and also about those around us.
I only desire for you to be your confident best because there are great benefits of confidence as we age.
Always ask before you leave the house…What do these clothes say about me? and if the answer builds your confidence then go have fun!
THE BENEFITS OF CONFIDENCE AS WE AGE: STRENGTH & JOY
The greatest benefits of confidence are strength and joy.
We can handle almost anything if we are confident, which helps us to feel stronger.
Confidence really is empowering and I discovered it when I came out from behind the mask.
Strength, joy, faith, and confidence all go hand in hand to help us as we age.
I really believed that someone needed to hear this today…and hope it helps.
Would anyone else like to share the benefits of confidence in their world? I do believe our communities and unique locations influence our own confident style.
It is a big picture.
Thanks for being here, hopefully we will see you tomorrow for more from Forever Strong, and remember to
STAY STRONG & KEEP SMILING!!
By Pamela Lutrell
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If I am out of my house, I am always a little over done. I am known for bright lipstick and accessories—jewelry, handbags,shoes, scarves—-adding pizzazz to the simplest of pieces to personalize it. I have collected for 40 years and still pull out things that I have history with; I have jewelry from my great aunts, grandmother, all of it probably worth nothing except to me. People always comment on it. My confidence comes from being me no matter where I am. (I stay in the cool color family.)
Good for you, Nyla! I love pieces That have a story and a memory with them! Thanks for sharing.
I’m definitely what many would see as overdressed, because I just enjoy dressing up, and I believe it shows respect for ourselves and others. It sometimes gets under my skin how sloppy people have gotten; it comes across as lazy or “giving up.” It seems that fashion trends get more and more casual as time goes by. I think dressing up changes our mindset and our productivity, increases confidence in ourselves and our abilities. I always worked in offices and had positions where I had to dress up (dresses and suits), and I know this impacted my attitude about my position and the work I did. People took me seriously. I think it comes down to respect for ourselves and others.
I agree, Karen, that self respect is a big part of it. Also, when I dress confidently even to just run errands, I am likely to stop buy places and go into places I have not been before. I always meet new people that way too. It makes mundane errand running more fun!
I want to add that a smile can do you and everyone around you good. If you look grumpy then you are not trying to choose joy. I am drawn to people with a smile and sometimes when I am grumpy a smile from a stranger can turn that frown of mine upside down.
A smile is so important and when I look my confident best, I go out with a smile. Thanks Lucinda.
Love the term “Team Overdressed”. I never leave the house without dressing with dignity and strength. Love that quote. Thanks for the great post today.
You are welcome, Jan. So happy to have you in Team Overdressed!
Great message, Pam. The JOY chart above is wonderful. Did you ever run to the grocery store looking pretty scary, and you think “I hope I don’t meet someone I know.” We’ve all done it. And you ALWAYS run into your pastor, your son’ teacher or some other such person. Haha. Too stressful. It’s better to focus on presenting your best self — for yourself and others.
Today’s blog – “She is clothed with strength and dignity” – Reminds me of the Wednesday posts and the difference I noticed when watching the Paris/London videos. Styles were so different with London being a little more eclectic (in my opinion) but with both showing women (and some men) with confidence and grace in how they clothed themselves in preparation for their day whether, shopping, meeting friends, working, etc…..
My favorite trip to the grocery was when I ran into a friend and she said..,You really do dress nice to come here! Loved it. Glad you enjoyed today, Marcia.
I agree Janet. It is refreshing to see so many people over 50 dressing for the day. I would love to do a street style video and ask them where are you headed?
As a member of Team Overdressed, a phrase I too love, when I dress daily, I also put on some makeup and am prepared to leave the house quickly if Mr. B says “ Let’s go…”. If I run to the neighborhood grocery, I’m dressed with my jewelry and/or scarves even if I’m wearing my sneakers. I also am very conscious of what others are wearing, and often compliment strangers as to how nice they look or how much I like some article of clothing they are wearing.
Good morning! I especially like your remarks about confidence without arrogance. I do think that a friendly manner and caring about others around us is important, and if dressing well helps us to reach out to others then it is well worth the effort.
I have been working to up my game on slacks because I am tired of wearing jeans so often. I can’t wear little ballerina flats because I need more padding on my foot plus I have a narrow foot. Would lace up tennis shoes look stylish with black or navy slacks? I am considering some silver tennis shoes.
Pamela, I appreciate all you do to encourage your readers.
I put on my “face” to mow the grass! HAHA. I think being our best self shows self respect and that you care. I used to save my “good” clothes for special occasions, but not anymore. Every day is special and we need to live to the fullest as we age. Life’s too short!
I always feel better when I up my fashion game, especially if I’m going someplace new to me. Example: I decided to join a long established book group at my county library. I knew no one there. I dressed in nice slacks and cashmere with statement jewelry and honestly that helped give me confidence to participate in the conversation. People then approached me after to chat and I felt welcomed and cheerful. Had I been in jeans and fleece (my usual at-home winter wear), I would have been more withdrawn.
I believe in dressing for myself even when I am not going out. Looking my best enables me to stick to my exercise plan and eat healthy. I am worth it and looking my best enables me to age with confidence at age 76. Thanks for a wonderful blog!
My ah-ha moment came when I realized I had no nice casual clothes, only nice work clothes. I was wearing spotted, worn out old clothing all weekend. And then I retired, and I was at home more, and I was wearing spotted, worn out … much of the time. At first, in true rut-like fashion, I bought more work-type clothes (all on sale because it was Covid). As I was wearing snagged clothes and looking at my beautiful, seldom worn dry clean only wardrobe, I realized I wasn’t honoring my whole life, my “now” life. I bought beautiful new loungewear, workout wear, and athleisure, which I usually mix up with jeans and sweaters. I also put on some minimal makeup even on home days. It makes me happier, more likely to nip out for some air, more likely to chat with neighbors at the mailbox. Yes, more confident. You noted it, but I’m not sure I got the message even in yesterday’s post: Team Overdressed doesn’t always mean “dressed up” in the traditional sense. I am somewhat resistant to the term because it feels like it violates my “aware” adjective … aware of current trends or levels of formality. I think you mean self-respect. So, ok, I’m on TO :).
I also love to compliment other women…it is so much fun to watch their faces light up! One of my favorite things to do with all ages.
Thank you, Kathy. I love my gold and copper tennis shoes and they are very current with just about any style. Also, silver is on trend this year, so there should be several available…just go to my shopping links and go to DSW and search silver sneakers.
I do want to put in a good word for the Easy Spirit ballet flats…the comfort in those is really great. But, sneakers are seen with trousers, skirts, dresses…you name it…you cannot go wrong.
Your last line is everything, Barb. Life is short and we will enjoy it more if we dress as if every occasion and opportunity is a special one. Wear the nicer clothes…eat on the good china…drink from the crystal glasses…most of us are past the time to wait for special events. Make each day your own. Thank you for writing that.
That is how I am also, Sharon. Putting on my confidence armor just helps me to want to be in the game.
Thank you, Mary Lou. I think you just convinced me to get a new workout outfit for my big return to the gym when the doctor says GO!
This is a great message! I did need this today because I have a tendency to fall into a “I don’t care attitude “ mainly because it’s winter and very cold here in Wisconsin. A coat covers up everything. I’m trying to dress everyday for myself which does make me feel better. I also make sure I put on some makeup and now am trying to get out everyday. This is helping but I do tend to slip. But when I care I know I feel better.
I personally do not think Team Overdressed butts heads with your adjective. The term means we dress our confident best for the day, and that means we are communicating our adjectives whatever they are. The word overdressed just happens because often our confident best leads to us being the best dressed in the moment wherever we are. I also have had people walk up to me in the grocery and downtown and say…You are that blogger aren’t you? I try to remember that when I am going out each time! I loved what you wrote about a touch of makeup even when home…I run into neighbors out walking or at the mailbox all of the time.
I hope to motivate you to care every day, Paula…so you have no regrets…and enjoy each day one day at a time. Cold weather can affect me because we do not have it that often. We are a strong front coming in next week and I thought about rescheduling some appointments…but I am not going to do it. I am going to go out and enjoy the cold. Thanks for the motivation.
Not sure I like the term “Team Overdressed” but I totally agree with the context. I feel aging confers invisibility, especially for women. So unless I’m headed to a quick early morning exercise class I take the time to dress and groom with intention even if I don’t have any errands or meetings. I always feel better and get better service everywhere. There is innate confidence in knowing you are ready for anything.
PS: love the street style videos!
Here’s to you and Celia and everyone else dealing with foot issues. My orthopedist says to practice walking outside, which is tough because the ground is lumpy. My PCP offered good advice, which I’d been thinking about anyway, which is to wear boots with a higher (above ankle) shaft so that my ankle is more protected. I’m going to start this weekend once I find my higher boots LOL. New England is so funky at the moment that I’m walking most in the house to avoid mud and snow outside. I’d love to know what TO consider basic makeup for around town. Thanks!
Thank you for addressing invisibility…confidence helps to squelch that. At the time Team Overdressed happened it was because a couple of readers here had been accused of overdressing by friends! It’s a tongue in check, fun way to say…I dress my best for me!
Thanks Maeve. I will update what I am doing tomorrow. Of course, anyone can share what a basic makeup is for every day…thanks for asking about it.
I think that there are many women who need to hear your message today because in various settings, I have heard many women say or write “I feel invisible.” That comes from a lack of confidence. At a very low point in my life, I felt that way. While I was always put together at work, at home, I felt as if no one cared how I looked. If I wore sweatpants & a man’s flannel shirt, so what. It reflected how I looked, acted & kept my home. That changed when I heard a speaker say, “You are a beloved child of God.” I felt seen. Those words changed so many things for me, & I have never looked back. That is why to this day, I have never owned another pair of sweatpants, joggers or whatever the current term is. They are a painful reminder of that time. I wear makeup & earrings at home. I only wear fleece tops at home. It’s sweaters, blouses or well fitted knit tops when I’m out & about. I will soon need to add some nice clothing in which to walk as I need to add more movement to my life.
Thank you for sharing this, Becky…it is powerful in so many ways. ALL of us are beloved children of the Almighty God. I was also embracing that in a real way at the same time I went through my own transformation. It was empowering to begin to dress well every day and look by best at the same time as I as building a strong, personal faith. The two together gave me the confidence to do anything. The confidence I had coming out of college was gone…it was my Heavenly Father who showed me that I could walk with it every day of my life no matter my age. There are ladies in my neighborhood who walk looking amazing. You are doing good here to encourage all of us to do just that.
What a wonderful message today, Pamela! Definitely a member of TO here, and a big fan of smiling at everyone I meet, as well as complimenting others on their appearance. It makes me so happy to see the surprise and pleasure in their eyes when I do that. Today, the phlebologist complimented me on my smile – I guess perhaps they don’t get too many of them LOL – and yesterday my dental hygienist told me that I always look great. She said that a lot of women show up looking like, “Ugh, I’m here,” but my appearance says “Here I am!” I love that!
I love that too, Niki!! A reason to keep smiling!!
Such a great post and comments. I agree that a smile is one of the best ways to express confidence as well as friendliness. Unless I’m doing yard work or heavy cleaning I make an effort to look put together even if I’m home all day. I loved your JOY chart. All great tips to remember, especially number 3..
So glad you liked it, Kathie! All of the comments today have kept me smiling!!
As someone who comes from an era where there was a strict dress code in the work place; I would love to know the ages of those who coined the phrase as ‘team overdressed’ … ☺. That being said and speaking namely for myself; also being a stay-at-home Mom a good portion of my adult life when there was an ‘invisibility stigma’ attached to being so, it was one that I ignored as basically took pride in what I did as well as how I presented myself. ( For example — I recall not being eligible for a credit card or on a form under profession writing ‘domestic engineer’ (to raise an eyebrow ☺) and heaven forbid I liked fashion to the extent it encouraged me to sew a lot of my own outfits and those of my children.) To conclude; though my experience and lessons learned differs from yours, I do agree with you Pamela that there are benefits in being confident in ones’ self and it has much to do with attitude. -Brenda-
I agree totally and think put together with makeup, earrimgs , a coordinated nice look makes us just feel good ! .. team overdressed is just that
…looking our best for any occasion instead of sloppimg around in nondescript bagggy sweatshirts and jackets , old ill fitting jeans and frumpy old shoes or unstyled uncombedhair as i see soooo many older ladies do …….who arejust broadcasting “ive given up “. I even decided after covid isiolation that im going to wear my nice sweaters., Tops pants and shoes at home too . Why not look just as nice staying home .?unless we are doing dirty cleaning ..most of my retired wardrobe, like yours is nice casual Anyway
..what are we saving our cute tops and scarves etc for . ?Our husbands and we , ourselves , deserve to see us look nice just at home too ! and we go so many fewer places now , its nice to feel put together at home . When i go out i add jewelry , a nicer jacket purse or shoes maybe ..and i invariably get a compliment from another woman . Which makes me smile .
As always…thanks for sharing, Brenda!
Thanks so much, Susan. It is all about being our confident best!
Im on team easy spirit ballet flats. , Pam ! LOVE THEM
They are very well padded and come in med and wide .. they both fit my feet . But wide wasnt too wide so a med might fit narrow feet fine . I want every color now,for wearing on my hardwood floors (as i need shoes that dont click clack….)’and they just go with everything . Great for travel or just around house .or going out. .thanks pam !
My Makeup for every day (at 76 )im often told i look much younger .. even my dermatologist and hairdresser tell me that and complete strangers ….
i look very washed out and tired without makeup . But i try to keep it natural looking , nothing worse than an old lady with too much makeup . Or raggedyann blush
. I havedark under eye circles and red headpale skin so ..i always start with
Face Serum , moisturizer with sunscreen first ..( and every night too..)
,then every morning
under eye
concealer and a very light foundation with sunscreen to even out any discoloration or spots ( newfave is phoera ) a bit of cream ( never use powder for my dry skin) blush below cheekbones ..and cream highlighter on cheek bones , on eyebrow i fill in with eyebrow powder and a brush or i have no eyebrows , creamy eye liner with a bit of light brown bronzey eyeshadow and Always dark mascara , i
top off with a berry lipstick and a spritz of cologne .. i do this every day . Takes about 10 mins ! But makes me feel confident ..
I use mostly yves rocher products as theyare all natural plant based products for years . I love them .. online and catalogue .
Thanks for sharing all of this Susan! I know it helps others
I might add that I remember my elegant mother always bathed and dressed for dinner in lovely but comfortable loungewear, usually a caftan. Dressing well at home not only honored her husband but was a form of self respect. Perhaps we should make a bit of effort on the home front too?
I need to hear that! Thank you for sharing her story. I want to be that way at home too.
Thanks for the post today. Confidence for me is an important part of sharing with others. I enjoy being around others and giving a smile can change an attitude or bring encouragement to others.
I think if being well dressed and put together gives you confidence, that is fabulous. But I also think true confidence is the knowledge that being yourself is enough. You are enough, as is, just the way you are. It is not worrying about whether people like you, or like what you are wearing. True confidence to me is ‘Idgaf if they don’t like me, or what I’m wearing, or (fill in the blank). My growth into my confidence began when I started to do things that scared me. Gaining confidence that way has given me confidence in my clothing choices; I dress for me now. I think confidence is an inside job, but there are different paths to get it.
I love clothes, makeup, jewelry…..all the pieces and parts that make up being a member of Team Overdressed. I am a member. But I would hate to read on a gardening blog that I have no respect for myself or my home or my family if I do not spend hours keeping my yard in tiptop shape. And I would not like reading on a cooking website that I have no respect for myself, or my family, or my friends if I do not provide healthy complete meals three times a day. And I feel guilty thinking about the friends I have who spend hours and days volunteering to help others who need help…..there’s no time in their lives to put more than five minutes into getting dressed before taking off to go help. People use their hours and days in ways they feel are most important and some have no time left over for endeavors others feel are important. We can celebrate being members of Team Overdressed but I would never want to put down those whose choice is a different (and perhaps more important) Team.
Hi Mary Frances, I think you have completely missed what I am saying. I have worked with women for almost 20 years. Their outsides often are reflections of their insides. Helping women to look and feel their best does help them to be joyful, hopeful, optimistic, and enjoy like more. Confidence is a very powerful thing. I love to help someone and then stand back and watch their face begin to glow. That light that comes on is wonderful. I know first hand that women tend to put ourselves at the bottom of the priority list and when we begin to love and respect who we are can change everything for the better. This is a sign of loving someone and the cooking example doesn’t work here. I hope you see the difference.
Work attire or just running out, I do try to look put together. It does help my confidence but sometimes I find myself almost apologizing or embarrassed when I’m around others my age who do not. I am afraid they will think I shouldn’t worry about fashion so much. Its a thing I’m working on, I do feel better, work better and smile more if I feel put together. Finding balance is important I know because I want to focus on helping and being a good positive influence on others. Thank you for this today. Working toward Strength this year too!
Don’t apologize…just be you…the most joyful, confident woman in the room. Soon this will be comfortably, confidently an expression of who you are. Dressing our best whether in athletic wear or a dress is for us…just be you. Take care of you and what makes you smile in the mirror.