Visibility and Our Ever-Changing Lives

“Never too old, never too bad, never too late, never too sick to start from scratch once again.” -Bikram Choudhury.

Visibility and change actually are related. People who are not open to change often just hide…they hide and hold on to the things, the life, the people, they so desperately do not want to release. The picture above made me think of this over the weekend. A huge freeway extension is going in right by our current home…it looks intimidating to one who really hates freeways. (ME!) A section of my grocery store parking lot is now a feeder ramp…and when I go to Marshalls, this is what I see. Change….all around me.

That little stinker, there he is again!!

My home is in chaos from painting and preparation for placing on the market. Change…all around me. It all seemed to flood in at the same time. I had just kissed my daughter goodbye….sent her literally to the other side of the world…when my youngest left the nest for college…then my menopausal bones began to ache…and my home needed to be sold…all at the same time!

Knit maxi dress:  Lane Bryant
Jacket:  Goodwill
Boots:  Ross

So, I get it….I understand that feeling of wanting to cling to what you know and not go forward. I understand that there are days you just want to hide and dream of what was. But Bikram Choudhury (whoever that is), has it right….it is never too late to start again. I will miss my house…I love it. But, there is a certain excitement about something new. Something that represents me and my husband’s new venture into middle age as adults enjoying life one day at a time!  We are all a work in progress…under construction, if you will!

Necklace and Belt:  Stein Mart
Bracelet:  Lane Bryant

Today’s look for VISIBLE MONDAY is actually a statement for me! I had walked away from dresses during my “parenting years” and left them in the past with career-world-Pam. But, since beginning this blog, skirts and dresses have returned. It is a statement that I am moving forward to whatever exciting things lie ahead. This clingy knit is actually out of my comfort zone, but when I pulled it off the Clearance rack at Lane Bryant, a voice in my head said TRY IT ON! And, I really liked it!  Has anyone else ventured into new fashion territories, because they represent a new life for you?

So, here we go, girls! I hope there are more of you ready to move forward with me and confront CHANGE with confidence, joy and strength. Bring on the freeways, the condos, the grandchildren, the new family members, the wrinkles (wait, did I say that…maybe not the wrinkles!), but whatever it is, I have made a decision to be visible and not hide.

 Great quote, but who is Andre Gide?? Now, go visit Not Dead Yet Style’s Visible Monday!
“Man cannot discover new oceans unless he has the courage to lose sight of the shore.” -Andre Gide

Also, check all of the fashionable ladies of MINGLE MONDAY


  1. Pam, first of all, that dress is just FABULOUS on you!! Secondly, I know what you mean…change is never easy for me. This move has brought more change than what I was expecting along with some unexpected emotions. And can you believe that at 45, I'm already perimenopausal? UGH!!! So here come the body changes! This post was just what I needed! Thanks girly! Lots of hugs and love to you! ~Serene

  2. I love that elegant look! you are so right, life is ever changing, just when you think you have it figured out – poof! In order to survive we must adapt. (and your son is cute)

  3. This dress looks fabulous and will be such a versatile piece in your wardrobe. I cringed to see all the chaos behind you in the picture…and I know that I am becoming resistant to change…in the workplace, but like you it does seem to be opening up my thinking about where I might be in a year or two.

  4. Indeed! I just left a comment on Debbie's post about being brave enough to put ourselves out there. Basically embracing change!
    I love the dress on you.
    Blogging has changed me in many ways. Maybe I'll post about that some day.
    Good luck with your chaos!

  5. Change is inevitable, we may as well embrace it! This long dress looks really good on you, making me re-think my fear of long skirts…

    Here's another one for you…don't know who said this but i love it:
    "Leap, and the net will appear."

  6. OK, the inquisitive reporter in me couldn't resist! Thanks to Wikipedia:

    André Paul Guillaume Gide (French pronunciation: [ɑ̃dʁe pɔl ɡijom ʒid]) (22 November 1869 – 19 February 1951) was a French author and winner of the Nobel Prize in literature in 1947.

    Bikram Choudhury (born February 10, 1946) is a multi-millionaire Indian yoga guru and the founder of Bikram Yoga, a form of hot yoga performed in a series of 26 hatha yoga postures done in a hot (105 degrees Fahrenheit or greater) environment


    You look STUNNING in that outfit…it's gorgeous!

    Cindy at Notes in the Key of Life

  7. That dress is beautiful on you & love your jewels! It is great that you are trying new styles…..I am doing that with my hairstyle….change is good!

  8. Pam … you look really skinny in this! And change is hard, but it's also really exciting, isn't it? I, for one, can't believe that I am writing my blog … I am finding that it is making me look forward to changes. Hugs!

  9. That dress is a keeper! It's very flattering and slimming.

    I know what you mean about change…we have some changes going on around here, too but not to the extent that you are experiencing it. Change can be good, but even good change can be very stressful. Take care of yourself.

    xoxo, A

    P.S. Your son just cracks me up 🙂

  10. That whole outfit is very elegant – the dress looks great on you! Funny – just today I was considering signing up to a Bikram yoga course!

  11. Houses around here are moving, but the house has to be perfect and the prices aren't what they once were.

    Change can work in your favor – maybe you'll attract buyers who want a house that's close to a major transitway.

  12. I love your outfit!!!
    Change…..I hate it and yet i love it. We moved a few years ago 100 miles from where we had lived-new jobs, new town, new friends. It can be an adventure!

  13. Pam, you are an amazing woman and I know you will be able to accept whatever change life sends your way.
    You look great in the dress. I love your accessories.
    I really like quotations. One of my favorite quotes is from the movie "Return to Me." It inspired me right after my mastectomy, when I was having one of those 'why me' moments.

    "It's the character that's the strongest that God gives the most challenges to."

  14. Pam excellent and poignant thoughts. You look great and even though it isn't always easy you are open to new possibilities!

    A new life is right around the corner!


    Art by Karena

  15. You look great in that dress! The whole outfit says "I'm worth it" in a good way (not in a Loreal marketing way).

    And I'm so with you on the change thing. We're packing up our house and emigrating across the globe in two and a half weeks (Eek!). I'm finding myself reluctant to let go of possessions and face the actual moving out/it won't be our home anymore thing. I'll get there.


  16. Hi Pam!
    My life has been nothing but changes! The biggest change was moving in with Mr. D. I was alone with my 2 children for the longest time
    It was a huge change and challenge to move in with a man, but made it and i am very happy!


  17. Hi Pam,

    You look absolutely dropdead gorgeous in this dress. I do try new things, although hesitantly at times, but it's good to try new things and sometimes things you though would never work. Looking forward to sharing your adventures this year.


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