Personal Style for Women 50+: It Takes Patience

I had no idea…no idea that when I went through my big makeover at age fifty that it would take determination, perseverance, diligence to discover the real me.  I had been hiding for so long I had to dig deep to find Pam’s style.  

I had developed a new attitude ….I Matter!  So it was worth all the work and study to craft a style I feel confident wearing every day.  It is reflected in my home and in my wardrobe.

But it does take time…remember, you have to date a lot of frogs before you find Mr. Right!  Well, you have to try on a lot of clothing before you know what you want your style to say about you! The messages, lifestyle,and your personality need to sync up into hitting one perfect sweet spot.   Then you can smile and leave home with confidence!

Everything here has been in my closet for awhile.  But I definitely feel like me in an outfit like this.  If you are still seeking to discover what your own style is,  persevere on, and don’t give up.  It really does take time and determination.  Not every woman is bohemian…or classic…or preppy…or anything.  We all have our own unique recipe (that is a word my partner JENNIFER CONNOLLY loves to use).  

Would anyone like to share how you discovered your own personal style?  Did it take time like me or did you nail it immediately?

We would love to hear from you….

Happy Wednesday!



  1. I'm 62 and still don't have a personal style–or any style I guess. Appearance was very downplayed by my parents when I was growing up. We never went shopping for clothes. I suppose it's not too late to discover my style, but I don't enjoy shopping at all. I'm not happy about this, but I'm not sure I'm unhappy enough to change.

  2. ahhh Ive been waiting for this post since we met. I totally have a style FOR ALL OCCASIONS EXCEPT FORMAL. I need me a formal style…I know it will take time.

    1. I am going to write more in depth about what helped me soon, Carla. I haven't revisited it in a long time and now that I am beginning my seventh year of blogging, I think it is time to go back to my own basics. I hope it will help!

  3. My style continues to evolve. I don't shop that much, and I really don't enjoy it. But I have a closet full of – stuff, and it is time, for me, to do more closet shopping.

    1. Closet shopping is only fun if you know the goal. I plan to write soon about how I reached my goals and I hope it will help. Thanks so much for our comment Alana!

  4. I think I knew from when I was very young. My mom was fashion-conscious and drilled it into us, how to look and act like a lady. I am forever grateful! I remember watching Grace Kelly and Audrey Hepburn in movies and thinking that was the look I wanted for me! Sounds kind of cliché I guess, but I was really young when I knew I was going to be a classic modern girl. It is how I feel most comfortable and how I feel truly me. I do mix things up with my casual wardrobe and add modern touches to my work wardrobe, but generally speaking, I'm a classic through and through!

  5. Reading Ines de la Fressange's book "Parisian Chic" got me to take a hard look at what I was wearing. About that same time I found your great blog which lead me to A Well Styled Life and une femme d'un certain age, all of which have inspired me to work at putting together a (small) wardrobe that is 'me'. Since I shop mainly at Goodwill this has taken some time, but I've found some really great pieces along with some fabulous designer handbags. I'm still learning as I go, but now I make fewer goofs when I shop. Thanks for your wonderful blog!

    1. Parisian Chic was the first style guide I read, Jane and it had a profound impact on me. I also shop Goodwill…and consider it a treasure hunting event when I go. Thank you so much for your encouragement and commenting.

  6. I have a bit of a style – I tend to know what works on me and what doesn't. I'm still hoping that I can wear more red, or beige or black in years to come (they don't look right on me without some other colour thrown in at the time being).

  7. You look great Pam!! Confidently, you. My style journey was initially painful but has gotten easier the more I've learned to trust my intuition. Thanks for mentioning me, friend! Have a great day.

  8. Wow, Pam. I like the lighter hair, and the more form fitting clothes. Wait, is your hair really lighter? Or just for the day. You are so intriguing.

    About my style: IDK. I guess I have a classic style because I like to look nice, but I don't like to shop. That said, I'm waaaay into color. I must have some color splashed about. No black on tan for me. Give me some turquoise, some burnt reds, some deep greens, some merlots, some violets. Maybe I have an artist's heart.

    1. Sorry to confuse you, sweet Adela…the top pic is an old one…when I had lighter hair. My hair is currently dark and I really like it, but upkeep is a challenge. We will see how long I am dark. I like it that you said I am intriguing…what a great word! Thanks for sharing about your color palette…you always look great…you are an artist!

  9. I appreciate your encouragement to be patient and to experiment until one finds the right "recipe." My former style based on professional needs isn't quite right now that I am retired. (And I'm still figuring out what the whole "retired" recipe is for me, too, not just regarding style.) The greater flexibility is both freeing and challenging. In general, I find that the fewer pieces in my closet, the happier I am, as long as they are the right pieces. And accessories are both fun to play with and make the same clothes into a really different look. I get lots of ideas to try from you, so here's a big thank you! And thank you for the acknowledgement that we don't all have unlimited budgets and appreciate the suggestions for items that span a wide range of price points.

    1. Hi RK, Your comment just made my day…I am glad I have been of some help. Different seasons of life bring new challenges, but look at it optimistically as an exciting new beginning. Sounds like you have a great fresh start. Thanks for stopping by…

  10. I love your hair lighter—you look younger—sometimes the dark hair and glasses seem to overwhelm you face. Pretty hair, just too muchof it!

  11. You look radiant and elegant. So you definitely have found your style.
    As you know I am still all over the place. From boyfriend jeans to elegant dresses. Cannot make up my mind.

  12. Hi from Italy! I'm starting to follow you right now…
    I think I have a personal style, I'm just afraid of not to be consciuous enough that I'm in my 50s… 😀
    So, I wear not so different than before, but even when I was 20 or 30 I never wore minidress or similar, so it could be that when I was young I was wearing clothes for a 40-50 years old? 😀
    (sorry for my English!)

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