Style for Women Over 50: Embracing Changes

This is me in 2013…from 2010 to 2013, I was able to exist with using glasses occasionally.  I only wore them when needed because I saw pretty well when I wasn’t reading.

Perhaps I can blame it on daily computer work followed with long nights of blogging, but my eyes worsened toward the end of that year.

I was devastated at first…and I tried on tons of glasses in search of the right pair of frames.  But, once I found them, I immediately knew…these are me! Now, I do not feel natural without my glasses.  They are so much a part of who I am, that I would never consider being without them.  I have not researched eye surgery to gain perfect vision back…these are a component of my personal style.

But, for now, so is my hair.  I am not ready to “embrace” the changes underneath these dark locks.  For now, my dark hair is me.  I have looked at other styles and done my research and I am looking toward change.  But every time I do, I look back in the mirror and smile…because for now, this is me.
Change can be such a good thing (when the time is right).  I think we let it depress us too much. I am glad about glasses and I am not sad about the gray hair…just not ready for it at this time.  You will know when the change is right for you…when it makes up your style!  

Does anyone have a story of change you embraced or you fought and you would like to share with us?  What is important is to not judge other women who have not chosen to change when you did…if you had the eye surgery so you don’t wear glasses, that is awesome.   If you have gray hair and love it on you, that is awesome as well.  But do not be sad or run from change…let it be on your terms.

Have a joyful Thursday!

30 Comments

  1. I will be turning 60 later this year and, for the past 5 years have had to wear heavy, strong-prescription glasses. This, unlike you Pam, left me very depressed about my appearance so I have just taken the plunge and had lens replacement surgery. The difference to my vision is astounding and I can now go without glasses again. I feel so much more confident that I am happy to embrace the new grey hairs appearing around my fringe and parting. I love following your blog and your positive approach to everything makes me feel so much better about myself.

  2. Thank you so much for sharing…I am really happy the surgery went well. It is funny how some changes hit each of us differently, but we must give each other the freedom to embrace or not embrace in our ways. Thanks for your encouraging words!

  3. This is a great reminder Pam. I've become really frustrated by women pouncing on other women for the style choices they've made. I don't always agree with the choices, but damn it they're her choice. (My one caveat: let it be healthy.)

  4. It's so important for women to support other women's choices! If we want to color our hair, or not, bravo. It's a personal choice. I love your dark hair in you. The glasses I require, are driving me batty. They leave huge indentations in my nose and give me headaches. So I'm trying contacts. And trust me, I wear the lightest, rimless glasses possible. So I accept what feels good and regect what doesn't.

  5. I've just finished my gray hair "grow out" and found it's not as gray as I thought. I don't look like "me" yet, but will once my cut grows a little. Glasses- not so easy for me. We all just do what's right for us. I was so tired of coloring my hair every two weeks. Such a relief! Debby

  6. I have needed to have my vision corrected since I was a child. I wear contacts and have since I was 13. My sister, on the other hand, eventually went with glasses and loves them. You're right, it's a very personal decision. I feel like "me" with contacts and feel more confident (for now). As for the hair, my dark hair (very similar in color to yours) feels like "me", as you said. I am not ready to jump on the gray bandwagon, mostly because I don't think I have the pretty gray/silver. And I think, again strictly for myself, I would feel older with the gray and I'm not ready for that. Some women look lovely with gray hair, actually youthful. I think I have the other kind of gray. We have a wig salon here in the cancer center I work in, and I'm contemplating going down there to try on a gray one, just to see what it would be like. I think as we get older, we have to cut ourselves some slack, generally speaking. It does no good to try to look 30 years younger, because our bodies change. However, we can dress to hide the less desirable changes and to stay current with style, adding up to a more youthful yet natural look. Play up the positive, downplay the not-so-positive!

  7. I agree with Jennifer that we need to be supportive of other women's choices. After breast cancer 12 years ago, not being able to wear contacts anymore, droopy jowls and thinning hair pale in comparison. Don't get me wrong… I don't like any of them, but I'm thankful I'm still here. Brenda

  8. I have "virgin" hair. It has never been colored, permed, or straightened. I start going gray at seventeen, but, at 62, I still have a few dark strands. It is shiny white, & I wear it in a chin length bob with bangs. It is easy wear, easy care , & very me. I am all for doing whatever makes you who you are & gives you confidence.

  9. I know I will do this some day…not sure when. I have found a style of highlights I like…it does have to be touched up often. But for now…I am happy and I am so glad you are happy. I understand being tired of having to color so often…that is my current fatigue!

  10. My husband has had gray hair for most of our 31 years of marriage…I think it was a gift God gave to me! He is younger than I am! You are so right we have to decide for ourselves what is right for us. Thanks so much for reading and stopping by!

  11. I've worn glasses since I was eight years old. I was so happy to get them — I could see, no more sqinting and walking to the blackboard to read. My friends even thought I looked better in glasses. Children have kind hearts, so that was an easy change. I tried contacts later, but they were very uncomfortable.

    My hair losing its color was a subtle change over many years. The greys blended in to my natural hair color like highlights, so that change came without too much difficulty. That is, until my child asked me to color my hair to look like the other moms. Bear in mind that girls in his class started getting their hair colored in kindergarten! I was at school and saw it for myself, when a mother brought her daughter late for a field trip, due to the colorist taking too long with her daughter's hair.

    I wonder what kind of messages we are giving to children when we don't accept them as they are. No wonder so many grown women have self-image problems. No wonder we slip into sadness over our appearance when we don't fit a very narrow image of how women should look, according to society and fashion magazines.

    I say embrace the look you want for the right reasons: do it for you!

    If you don't fit the fashion mag image, stop reading fashion magazines.

    Aging is part of the life process, and procedures or surgeries won't stop it. If they make you feel better and you can afford it, go ahead with that in mind.

    We should all take care of ourselves and love this vessel we're in. It's a short journey.

  12. For better or worse, my distance vision has improved over the years as my close vision has worsened slightly. But I chose to wear no-line bifocals most of the time out of sheer laziness – I don't like readers and I'm afraid of putting my glasses down and sitting on them. I color my hair and started using retin-a last fall. Now I'm trying Biosil to increase collagen everywhere, including my bones. I exercise 3 times a week for 45 minutes at the local Y pool because I've had MS for 30 years. I've had to fight my decline harder than most women and I think it's paid off. Health should always be our primary goal and beauty will follow.

  13. You are lovely. Thank you for being a trailblazer. You look marvelous in the glasses. I was so happy when I discovered "cheaters" and your site (although the cheaters came first a long time ago and I just discovered you, better to see you with, my dear)! -julie (overfiftyinhollywood.blogspot.com)

  14. Thank you, Julie! How kind of you…and welcome to the blog! I miss cheaters because you could easily have more than one fun pair. It is too expensive with the "serious glasses" enjoy the fun of the cheaters! Hope you will come back soon!

  15. I have done a lot of changing stuff: plastic surgeon on eyelids and on the lower part of my face and my neck and liposucking of my waist. Not because I resent aging but the first two things because it made me look sad and tired which I wasn't. The waist sucking was vanity. I didn't know how to dress my inverted triangle body anymore when my waist suddenly started to bulge (7 cm in one year). Now I am " done" haha. I don't want to inject or have strange parts inserted in my body. And I still colour my hair, which all are choices as you say. I love your hair by the way. It is so full, long and thick, the dream of many women. Certainly my dream. We have a saying in The Netherlands which translates: as long as your hair looks right (then everything is alright).
    I am still admiring you for the work change choices you made. You just follow your instinct Pam, that works pretty good with you.
    Greetje

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