Cultivating Everyday Elegance: Styling the clothes we love over 50

Over 50 Feeling 40 in Chicos for work from home

Whew! What a week…it has been a long time since I have had little ones that long.  But I am still here with Cultivating Everyday Elegance and today what I want to focus on is styling the clothes we love over 50 and how just loving them alone can result in elegance.   We are all as unique as the snowflakes…which no two are alike.  Same with people and I believe we can all achieve elegance, but it might be a different definition for each one of us and simply mean how we each wear CONFIDENCE.

So far, we have heard on these posts in the comments from a rancher, retired teachers, a woman who loves to ride with her husband on his motorcycle.  And that is just a tip of what I know.  Beautiful, unique in design just as snowflakes are. (I think I am on to snowflakes because it is so hot right now)!  I really do not want us to get hung up on the word, “elegance.”  In a way, I think we are taking the word to a new level.



Pamela Lutrell's work from home Chico's style

Fashion designer Vera Wang is known to have said “A woman is never sexier than when she is comfortable in her clothes!”   So, think about that…we are all comfortable (confident) in different types of clothing and in different styles we see as our own form of elegance.   

I understand there are those who believe a kimono or caftan is sloppy and not elegant in any way; however, I believe there are some kimonos/toppers/wraps/ponchos which can be very elegant if styled the right way.

This look is one I love and feel very comfortable and confident wearing.  The column of black (leggings and V neck knit top) along with the long Chico’s necklace is slimming and directs the eye in the right direction.  I love the way this kimono falls…yes, it is oversized, but I feel elegant wearing it with my gold flats.  We each have clothing we love and items which communicate the messages we want to say.  So, think about what clothes make your smile and feel confident?


Here is another homework assignment…write a list of all of your positives!  No negatives…just positives.  Then write down what you love to wear…the clothing, the colors, the looks that you believe say...THIS IS ME!  Look back at the list and think about how you can tell the world what your positives are…either through your dress, your attitude, your life with others…how can you share the best of you.  To me, ladies, that is elegance. Knowing who YOU are and owning the positives.  Of course we all have areas to work on…but, we should not just concentrate on those areas all of the time.  There are too many depressing things going on today, look to your positives to get through it.  A confident woman is a strong woman.

Next, write a list of what brings you joy…what puts a smile on your face every day.  These are great things to ponder and to have handy to review every now and then.

I have written this several times already, but my own journey to achieve everyday elegance is about refining me…refreshing and sharpening me as I begin a new stage of life and as I consider the legacy I want to leave my children and grandchildren.  For me, it is about how I carry myself, how I react to the world around me, how I maintain positivity, what lessons I teach them and how I respond to my new circumstances.  And….if I happen to figure out how I will dress and look for each day with an elegant touch…then I want to do that.  But, staying true to me, will include garments I love such as my kimonos and toppers.

What clothing do you feel your best wearing?  Please share and understand that when you are wearing it, you will project strength, confidence, joy….and elegance.



Soft Surroundings


Eileen Fisher Big Summer Sale


Nordstrom Rack




Pamela Lutrell for Goli GummiesThere are several ways that I generate income through this blog in order to cover business expenses and give myself much needed income.  Purchases through the slideshow links is one way, ads on the page is one way and a new way is through ordering or re-ordering the GOLI Apple Cider Vinegar gummies through me with my GOLI LINK HERE.  Again, if you are not familiar with the benefits of apple cider vinegar, you should speak with your personal physician.  My husband and I are sold on the benefits and I am proud to represent this product.  I am going to leave this at the bottom of my posts so that when you, friends or family would like to order you can use my link.  Thanks for the support.  This is a great product; as well as, the ones below!


Mr. B and I love our meals from Sun Basket!

Sun Basket on Over 50 Feeling 40


Sun Basket is a delicious, easy, fun home delivery meal plan


My Complexion Loves Chamonix…My esthetician says my complexion is super tight!

Chamonix on Over 50 Feeling 40


All natural, plant-cell technology skincare


By Pamela Lutrell





  1. That is one of the best outfits i have seen on you. It is flattering and demonstrates casual elegance. The shoes kick it up a notch.

    1. If this outfit is for a look toward fall— yes but our summer here in Northeast has been sultry and very humid so this style won’t really work or even be considered until it cools off a bit. I love it however and could see me wearing this come late September! You look beautiful as always!

      1. I hope you read the post, Paulette. I am not suggesting this outfit for anyone but me. Please read and tell us your favorite looks.

  2. im laughing because my favorite look, is one that doesnt get outside much, because i live in south florida. but i love my shoe boots, with some skinny jeans, and top with something jsut like you have on in the picture, something flowy, and bold. now, im thinking there isnt much elegance in shoe boots, but hear me out….this would be the outfit i would throw my shoulders back and feel confident in…maybe my okie roots, maybe because i was never the petite flower ( remember elementary school group class pictures?, i was the girl standing in back with the boys) ive always been more of a moose, but put a moose in forest picture, and they have a certain elegance, right? so its just owning it, that is the key to my elegance.
    cant wait to get started on my homework, lol…

    1. I was also the girl in the back! But I prefer to call us “statuesque”…I hope you enjoy your homework!

  3. That’s a beautiful Kimono and looks wonderful with the dark column underneath. I can understand how that feels elegant and gives you confidence. It’s striking. If I’m answering your question with what immediately comes to mind, I’d say I feel confident in blazers and jeans (worn together). However, I’m going to be doing the homework in depth, because like so many women, I can point out my flaws quickly but don’t spend enough time being thankful for the positives. The whole “assignment ” appeals to me because I think I’ll uncover some new ideas. This is an important step in my style journey!

  4. Oh I think you look beautiful today!!! I love it!!! I love your smile and positive outlook on life. I look forward to reading your blog everyday. You have kept me going thru this Covid madness. Thank you so much for taking all the time doing this.

  5. This is one of my favorite outfits that you’ve worn! Just love the colors and the overall look. Beautiful choice!

  6. My confidence outfit is slim dark jeans, a tank, and a beautiful quality duster or shawl collared cardigan in burgundy or a deep neutral. The wildcard is always my handmade beaded jewelry, likely a wide cuff and a large pendant. Add leopard flats and a pecan-colored Brahmin bag, and my go to outfit would be complete.

  7. I love this look right on you, Pamela! It says style, comfort, elegance and confidence.
    I think my best outfits are mostly long slender pants or jeans with some sort of soft knit top and a tunic length topper. Then add a long necklace or 2, bracelets and a colorful scarf. I feel I could go anywhere in the world and feel confident. For sure it would be shades of blue or navy with grays or cinnamon with booties for cool months and lighter gray, greens, and maybe a little pink with platform sandals or interesting flats for warmer months.

  8. It’s interesting – as I read the comments, I see that there are several answers much like what I was going to say! I feel best in a lean column – generally skinny jeans, but definitely ones that are not sloppy and most often they are a color other than blue. I feel best with something lightweight and flowy on top, or a well-fitting sweater in winter. And I love boots, too – they give me that confident feeling somehow! Good looking sandals are a must in summer. I think shoes are a big key to confident-looking attire. Maybe because how you walk is one of the main proofs of confidence.

    I also LOVE a flowy long skirt with a tee or something less-big on top. That look makes me feel like I can take on the world! I just re-purposed a long dress with a too-small waist into a long skirt – that’s my new favorite. I have boho tendencies…but still, when I feel great, there’s a lot better chance of looking confident!

    You look great! I have really been appreciating your blog since I found it. I’m working on re-gaining some “style” I’ve lost in the last few years. It’s never too late!

  9. My confidence zone is slim fitting slacks, a blouse or tank and a tailored blazer or lightweight jacket. Unfortunately this is hot death in our California summers. For spring and summer, I love the sheer jackets like those I find often at Chicos and closer fitting sheer ruanas over a sleeveless tee . I love what you are wearing and the touch of gold is fabulous. I’d feel great wearing it in the summer with blue capris and a tee…and no elegant woman should be without several pairs of metallic shoes!

  10. I am looking forward to pondering the homework assignment because I have been thinking that I need to do more things that bring me joy. The past five months have taken a toll on my mental health, as it has so many others. I’m enjoying reading the answers to the confidence question. They speak to how different everyone is, & that is a beautiful thing. I feel confident in a crisp white shirt & black pants or dark washed jeans. I also feel good in cardigan sweater over a sleeveless mock neck shell & dark pants or jeans.

  11. You exude “All-American, Girl Next Door” confidence, most definitely. You also bring a playful quality to elegance; proving it isn’t “boring & stuffy” *grin*.

    Homework sounds interesting. I still get caught by those little ghouls “self-doubt” & “self-defeat”. They’ll rear their ugly little heads at most inopportune moments.

    My daily confidence boosting outfit is pencil skirt, top, & flowy topper. Always a monochromatic. column of colour under with pattern/print over. Not shy of wearing colourful tones, either; they’re my neutrals.

    Beginning quarantine/social isolation played with different necklace & scarf combinations! Summer it’s been all about different drop earring styles (usually a single small stone/pearl stud Gal).

    Oh… magnetic eyelashes, too, HaHa. Easing back into putting on my face daily; not quite there yet. A weekly routine of home mani/pedi _is_ taking hold. Baby steps.

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