Four Tips to Give the Perfect Gift

20 Comments

1. What a helpful post Pam!! Thank you for the ideas and a reminder to really focus on what each recipient would love…. Especially our older children!

2. You are so welcome, Sabrina!

3. I love to buy gifts for people, and agree totally with the idea of buying something the recipient wants, but would not buy themselves. And paying attention works too. One tip I have for adults is buying a luxury version of something they wear and love, such as high end athletic wear. I realize that’s not in everyone’s budget, but sales and clearances can go far if you have something in mind and give yourself time to shop it. A handmade gift or gift wrapping is also usually well received.

4. Thanks for sharing, Linda!

5. I love this! Gifts that make you feel seen are the best!

   Do you have any thoughts on a gift for an elderly woman who is downsizing and has recently been diagnosed with dementia? We are making a trip to my in-laws this year, and they are struggling health wise.

6. These are some really good ideas. As I am right in the middle of shopping this is helpful.

7. Happy to help, Paula!

8. It has been awhile, Stacy. But I do remember my MIL liked cozy blankets and pretty scarves that made her feel pretty. I hope that helps

9. Stacy, I am so sorry to hear that your family member has a devastating diagnosis of dementia. Depending upon the climate where she lives, think cozy and comfortable. A lovely throw, warm slippers and flannel pajamas. Or a lovely box of tea. Amazon has collections and bamboo boxes for tea to last most of the year. I also bought my friend a Password book so she can keep track of her passwords without little pieces of paper stashed everywhere. Just some suggestions that add to Pam’s great ones.

10. Thanks for helping Sydney!

11. Stacy, my mother was in a dementia facility the last year and a half. There were 2 things she loved—photos of her growing-up life and music. She couldn’t remember us all of the time, but always remembered photos of the little town she grew up in and early photos of her parents and sister . She also loved music, especially concerts of Andre Rieu. We gifted all of his DVDs to her facility and they showed those concerts on their big screen TV. It made me especially happy because all of the residents got to see those lovely, happy programs. May I tell you of my last visit to her? I used to fly in every other month to see her. The last time I went straight from the airport to her. The nurse was putting her to bed. When she saw me she smiled, put her arms up and asked, “Are you my mother?” I think often of that. She knew I was someone she dearly loved and that touched me deeply. What a beautiful memory she left me.

12. Your comment is so touching, Linlee. Thank you for sharing that moment with us.

13. Pam, once again you’ve given us great ideas for remembering our friends and family at this special time of year. Gift giving is my love language, and it’s been hard for me to dial that back now that I’m on a fixed income. I used to work two or three extra jobs year-round so I could indulge my loved ones on their birthdays and at Christmas. I have always believed that everyone should get a pony for Christmas or their birthday at least once in their lifetime. Not necessarily a real live horse, but something that is over the top, outrageous, impossible, unexpected but is their heart’s (possibly unspoken) desire. From the used Honda I gave my daughter on her 16th birthday to trips and guitar lessons, I’ve been so blessed by the recipient’s reaction to these gifts. It’s more about knowing the person really well than spending a lot of money, and listening carefully year-round makes a huge difference, as you mentioned. Just yesterday at our belated Thanksgiving meal, my best friend’s mom mentioned that her favorite afternoon treat was a jumbo Tootsie Roll pop, preferably chocolate or cherry. I casually said “Where on earth do you get those?” and her son-in-law answered “I order them for her on Amazon.” I always get her husband his favorite candy and was wishing I knew of something equivalent for her, so I came home and immediately ordered some for a Christmas treat. It was not expensive, but she’ll be tickled to receive them. Gifts like the sweater and earrings for your daughter are so perfect; not only the items themselves, but the timing so she can enjoy them through the season.
    For Stacy, I took care of my mother with dementia for twelve years before she passed late last year. She never lost the desire to read, so I tried to keep her stocked with books from her favorite Christian authors. She also loved word search puzzles, which come in large print versions if eyesight is an issue. As the Alzheimer’s grew worse, I would re-wrap books I had previously given her because they were new to her again. She was always cold, and as others have mentioned, loved things to keep warm. It’s just important to watch out for things that could trip them, like big furry house shoes. She also appreciated postage stamps and boxes of assorted occasion cards so she could remember friends and loved ones even after she could no longer leave the house. She was a stickler for a healthy diet, but most older people have some sort of treat that says “special” to them. For my daddy it was a box of chocolate covered cherries and a bag of orange slice candy. I take my best friend’s mom a bag of Stauffer’s animal crackers every time I visit her throughout the year. They are low sugar, keep well, and she absolutely loves them. I only buy her candy at Christmas, but can’t wait to give her the jumbo Tootsie Pops I just learned that she loves. Finally, most elderly people enjoy photos of loved ones, especially their grandkids. Hoping that helps! Best wishes for a good visit with them, and for her continued ability to function independently.

14. Thank you for sharing about your mom. I know these are tender places. I hope Stacy has seen this talk.

15. I don’t usually shop Talbots due to fit issues, but couldn’t resist ordering the Christmas tree sweater you got for your daughter when I saw that it’s on sale 50% off today! I also got the metallic scarf in highland green to coordinate with it at 40% off. I felt that would be more versatile than the matching tree scarf. Wanted to share that for other readers who loved it but were deterred by the full price. Happy shopping!

16. Wonderful tips Pamela and I particularly agree with #2 as knowing and listening to the recipient certainly does help when choosing a gift for them. For example; an elderly friend of one of my sisters (whom has now passed on) I do buy for, and for her birthday I gave her a (bright pink very girly) mini cordless chainsaw (of all things) that she absoutely loves since maintains are large property by herself and for this Christmas I have chosen to give her a C*vid-19 & Influenza A/B Test Device Kit (not available at our Pharmacies in Canada) with hopes it gives her ‘peace of mind’ as finds it diffcult to get an appointment at any given time with her Doctor which she has expressed. Also I’ll be including a small box of Laurent Gerbaud chocolates from Belgium not available here. As to Stacy’s question (and possibly of interest to some of your other readers); for ‘adapable clothing’ she may find something on Silverts.com where one can shop by need. -Brenda-

17. This is lovely, Pamela! My favorite: think in terms of blessing. I’m not great at gift giving, don’t particularly like to shop, but I remind myself of how as kids we enjoyed gifts from a favorite great aunt. She didn’t see us often, but each Christmas she sent a box containing eight small presents (six of us girls plus our mom and dad), all wrapped in colored tissue and decorated, each year different. Might be sequins, polka dots, cut-out pictures or letters glued on, maybe spelling our names … This was the 1950s and she didn’t have much money, gifts themselves might be something of hers, but she put love and time and colorful creativity into them.

    And Linlee — what a precious memory.

    Thanks for this good lesson!

18. Love your examples, Brenda!

19. Thank you for being here!

20. Great ideas for how to give a thoughtful gift. It shows what a wonderful person you are!

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