Mother-of-the-Groom Journey: Shedding light on decisions made


Happy Thursday, friends!  We are just 10 days away from the wedding!  This post is a little random, but called Mother-of-the-Groom Journey: Shedding light on decisions made

My first born child is my daughter.  When she married, I did put this much time and care into me for the wedding.

The second wedding, my oldest son, was right after Christmas and I was not focused on me at all.  The pictures show it…sadly.

It has been fun to take care this time and share the Mother-of-the-Groom journey with all of you.

Today’s post features some random decision making that I have evaluated in the journey.  One surprising discovery.

So come along and see what I have learned….



This is the only picture you have seen of my gown taken months ago on the day I found it at Nordstrom.

I tried it on again recently for a friend of mine and discovered it could use some tailoring.

Another friend said…you need a body slimmer with this dress.

So, I headed to Dillard’s because I know the ladies who work in lingerie at one of the locations.


I tried on more than one.  If I had worn the first one to the wedding, I would eventually run from the room crying…and that would not be good for anyone.

But, this Honeylove Shaping Cami Body Suit was very comfortable and doable.

HOWEVER…and that Is a big HOWEVER…the tailor taught me something different.

She asked that I NOT wear a bodysuit and let her tailor the dress to fit me without it.

She said so many women and girls with prom dresses come in with a bodysuit, but a good tailor prefers to tailor to the body and it will be more flattering.

When I took it off, and looked in the mirror after she pinned the dress, I realized she was right.  That was a surprising revelation to me.

Wish I had gone to see her first.

My friend, Karen, came over and helped me finalize my decisions on what I will wear to the events next week.

It helped so much to have someone I trust to bounce these decisions off of…and we talked them through and I believe made the right ones.

I should have done that with the bridal shower decision.


mother-of-the-groom journey

Preparing for a big family event can bring on some sleepless nights and a fair amount of stress.

For me, I see it immediately in my eyes.

That is why I desired to try Plexaderm Rapid Reduction Serum and see if it worked according to all of those ads out there.

I am very impressed…it does work as it claims to…brighter eyes and tighter eyes.  I believe this will be perfect for the wedding pictures and other special events.

You only need to use a tiny amount.  The reviews that say it doesn’t look good with makeup are using too much product.  Just a tiny little amount under your eye will do it.

If I had daily challenges with eye bags and wrinkles under the eye, I would use this every day.  For me, it is great for special event pictures.

I do recommend.

Here are a few key points:

  • Reduces the look of under-eye bags and wrinkles in minutes.

  • Instantly smooths the appearance of crow’s feet, forehead wrinkles, and lines around the mouth.

  • Starts working instantly, with results in as little as 10 minutes.

  • Achieves visible results in just 10 minutes that last up to 10 hours!

  • Resealable tubes make it easy to use, store and preserve your Rapid Reduction Serum.

  • Creates an invisible veil on the skin for “wear all day” comfort.

  • Delivers instantly smoother, younger-looking skin without painful injections or surgery.

  • Fragrance-free, paraben-free, sulfate-free, oil-free, gluten-free, and no artificial colors.

  • Cruelty-free – Plexaderm products are never tested on animals.

To see Before and After pictures, look at these on their website.

I have only tried it under my eyes, but I am about to try it on my forehead.

As an anonymous quote says…I want to put a twinkle in my wrinkle!



In January, I considered surgery on my funky feet to be ready for the wedding…but time ran out and I wanted to be able to work out to speed up the weight loss.

So, now I am looking for something to be done in August after a little travel.


If feet sicken you, I apologize.  I am that way about teeth…so I get it.

This is my X ray.  I am getting two opinions to fix my left foot first.

It would entail the foot pad behind the toes pulled up, the big toe straighten and the other toes given room to not curl so quickly.

The pin is from a bunion surgery 30 years ago.  I thought it was the problem.

But, doctor #1 says no.  Another surprising lesson.

I see doctor #2 today.  Then I will make decisions for the summer.  August is a good time to lay low in air conditioning…most often our hottest month.

I hope sharing all of this Mother-of-the-Groom Journey is helpful to you.  I know some of you are facing wedding decisions as well.  Have you ever been told not to wear a body slimmer if the dress is tailored??

Your thoughts are always welcome!


By Pamela Lutrell

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  1. Plexaderm contains ingredients found in cement, that’s why you have to let it set. Why on your forehead, your bangs hide your forehead.

  2. Sometimes my forehead does show especially if there is high humidity or wind…that would just be for the wedding. I do not know if you claim is true about the cement…do you have a way to collaborate that. Thanks Jane.

  3. Happy wedding! Please see an orthopedic surgeon specializing in feet not a podiatrist.

  4. Pam, I forgot how beautiful that dress is. A good tailor is worth every penny. I made my first dress when I was in 5th grade and have sewn hundreds of pieces of clothing since. Good fit is key along with color and style. I have friends who will pass on a special piece of clothing rather than face the added cost of tailoring. Men who purchase $$ suits accept it ( and true, it is usually free). I am glad you listened to your seamstress and are happy with the results. The day is just around the corner! I hope you share a few photos!

  5. That is a really beautiful and classy dress, and you look great in it. All the best for a fantastic “big day”! I occasionally used to have pants adjusted by a tailor because my waist was significantly smaller than my hips. (Not the case anymore, unfortunately, lol.)

  6. This is my first trip to a tailor in a while, Kathy. I guess that is why the body slimmer information was new to me!

  7. As the mother of only boys I have identified with your Mother-of-the-Groom journey. However, I also know the stress of weddings and relief when over. Your dress is so beautiful, and I know you and Mr. B will look lovely and dapper. It was very interesting to hear what your tailor said, but I’m also going to look for the Honeylove garment at Dillards. And I’m going to order the Plexaderm sample to see how it affects my under eye area and wrinkles. I certainly hope that you can rest well as you are counting down to the wedding day. You seem to have thankfully made your decisions early enough to not feel the stress of late decisions to be made. And I’ve enjoyed being along for your decisions.

  8. It was helpful to me to discuss these decisions with all of you! Thanks for sharing the journey…almost to the destination!

  9. Have you used any of the genucell products for your eyes, especially for under eye bags which I have.
    I’d love to hear your comments and results.

    Purchased the Boom Trio after viewing your post. Just received but believe that I will really like them. I couldn’t find them in your shopping links but clicked their name on your and went to their website. Hope that you got credit.

    Nordstrom provided tailoring.

  10. Yes…I have used Genucel under my eyes for years and still do on a daily basis. I think it will get me credit. The Plexiderm works on the nights I do not get a full night’s sleep….which right now, are many nights. So I am glad to have it when my eyes need an extra touch.
    I know that Nordstrom would have done tailoring on this dress…but I am in a time crunch with so many things that I went to a recommended tailor near me and she comes highly recommended…yes, I paid money I did not need to pay, but running out to where Nordstrom is right now on a freeway under construction is not an option. Thanks Mary

  11. You will likely be much more comfortable without wearing the shaper. No matter how comfortable they might seem at first, hours in can be quite different. I am so sorry for your poor feet, and completely sympathize as mine are only a decade behind yours and are a struggle for me already. One toe in particular is painful each morning, as if there’s a little arthritis. Maybe it’s just unhappy from the unnatural twist! Ugh! I wish you success when it comes time.

  12. I have been enjoying following along with your MOG journey so much – I look forward to every new post! I had four hammer toes fixed a couple of years ago – two on each foot at different times – and having the surgeries was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. I know that you’ll be very happy with the results. The pain was not that bad with the meds and I thought that the recovery was pretty easy. One tip I have is to use a walker instead of crutches while you’re staying off your foot post-surgery – so much easier and more comfortable to get around. Best of luck, Pamela! And keep those MOG posts coming. You look beatiful in that dress!

  13. You look lovely in that dress! Can’t wait to see the photos. Just remember to take care of yourself during this really, really, really stressful time. Remember that we are all pulling for you to have a marvelous day!

  14. You always look lovely And I’m sure you will sparkle in the wedding pictures. Your smile will win the day.
    On under dress support, I would go with tgecrailirsudea!

  15. I love that dress you picked out for the wedding! I loved it the first time I saw it on you months ago. A good tailor is worth her weight in gold. I’ve had some mishaps with a tailor in my area. so a good one is very valuable! I hope all the festivities are as wonderful as you imagine!

  16. Hi. I look forward to more pictures of you in the wonderful clothes you bought.
    I want to echo Nyla’s comment above: go to an orthopedic surgeon, and find one that specializes in feet.
    Wishing you all the best in the week ahead.

  17. Just in this one post, so much is going on with you, Pam!!! I wish I’d thought about a special eye ‘fix’ before my son’s wedding two weeks ago. I’m hoping for good pictures LOL. Regardless of how I looked, my son was so handsome and my new DIL was so lovely and radiant and both so happy … And we got to spend time with family and my son’s childhood friends whom we haven’t seen in forever. Who could ask for more?

  18. That dress looks beautiful on you. I trust the tailor. Shapewear is nice but it’s also hot IMO. Just curious, what shoes will you wear with the dress?

  19. Oh Pam. So excited to see all of this preparations come to fruition. 👏🏻👏🏻 Your post on the bridal shower made me sad that you felt out of place. I guess because it is such a concern of mine to not stand out in an awkward way. Then when I saw the outfit you wore I felt sad again BECAUSE you looked really good. Yes you would not think of brown as a spring color but the choice of the cut and material for the blouse with the beautiful, contemporary white pants made the outfit work. You looked elegant and sophisticated! You go girl!

  20. I have funky feet like yours but I’m in my mid-fifties so I see no reason to have them done except for pain. I’m not even sure if that would help. I buy very good shoes!!! Meaning $150 to $250 not 600 or more!!! But I’m finding with boots my limit must go way up!!!

  21. Hi Suzi,
    Mine have thrown off my balance and that is very important to me…plus it’s painful!

  22. Always always trust your tailor. Why wear an uncomfortable , hot undergarment when the dress can be tailored to fit you? I have taken coats, jackets, jeans, everything to mine; she is a genius. She tailored a vintage Burberry three layer trench for me so that it fit great and looked fabulous. The coat was worth $$, so well worth the tailoring cost, which wasn’t that much. In your shoes, I would have done this immediately upon picking the dress if there was any fit question at all. Much less stressful to have it ready and waiting, and to not stress about a weight loss journey in addition to everything else.

  23. Pam, on the eye creams. I have used the Juvederm but also the eye cream from Genucil for puffy eyes. I like the Genucil better as there is no white residue if you get to much. Plus I have not had an issue with wearing makeup over it. Adding any liquid or moisture to the Juvederm totally reversed it. Think tears.

  24. Your dress is absolutely perfect in my eyes but mine don’t really matter — glad you love it too. I’m sure you’re doing that “stuff” from that dreadful TV ad for us — I’ve checked out online reviews which are not very good but wait for what you think. As far as foot surgery goes please be very careful. I live in the Boston metro area, world class hospitals, right? I have a number of friends who had “well known surgeons in their field” perform foot surgery and recuperation ended being 6 months and still not as successful as they were expecting. I know you can always have people with negative thoughts — they didn’t follow instructions, commit to the needed pt etc. but these ere very conscientious, athletic women who follow directions and work hard to keep their athletics going 💕

  25. Pam, your dress is beautiful and you look stunning even in the try-on photo. You are so lucky to have a wise tailor. You will be so much more comfortable on the big day without having to wear shape wear. I’m so excited for you and can’t wait to see the wedding photos that you will share. Sleep well if you can. I wish I could send you some of our cool mountain air. Its the best sleep remedy I know of.

  26. The website mentions silicates from shale clay – which is used in pottery or, when mixed with limestone, cement.

  27. Agreed – I’m also a Deep Autumn season & was sad to read that Pamela felt dark brown didn’t look appropriate, because she certainly looked appropriate to me! I would have maybe added a necklace in warm teal, watermelon coral or a richer gold to lighten it up, but I refuse to go out & buy pastels, which are unflattering on me, for a spring event. Maybe I’m just stubborn though, haha.

  28. Sometimes the surroundings and what other women wear can affect how we think about our selection. But as I wrote, I let those insecurities go and had a lovely time!

  29. IMHO, very wise on both accounts re having a tailor make the required alterations on your dress to obtain a perfect fit and seeking a 2nd opinion for surgery on your feet. As to the Reduction Serum and just a thought; in event you may have your makeup done for that day, you might wish to advise the person who is doing it to avoid any chemical inter action. -Brenda-

    P.S.: I think I have mentioned before that my son has degrees in both Fashion Design as well as Haute Couture and he would agree with Deborah (above) that ‘a good Tailor is worth every penny).

    Also my 1st job was working for three Orthopedic Surgeons who were tops in their field and it wasn’t unusual for them to have to correct botched procedures .

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